So, God has been moving in our lives, and doing amazing things in our hearts, and I still get stuck on the waiting part! I have made progress in this area.....actually, A LOT of progress in learning to wait on God....but, like most other people, I still could use some work!
We have been in transition now, as a family, since November 22...that's 5 months!! We thought we'd be out of money and food and in danger of losing our house by January 1st. God must be getting a good chuckle out of that thought process!! My God has provided all our needs, wants and desires faithfully and abundantly above all we could think or imagine during this past 5 months....and again, why am I surprised?!?! I still find myself surprised that I am amazed at what God does...after all, I KNOW He can do anything!! I grew up in a family where I saw God's provision time and time again....and have seen the same thing in my married life....time and time again.
So for the waiting part....my limited, fickle mind just figured that since the whole process that caused us to no longer be a part of the church we labored in for 10 years was so accelerated, the next phase of life must be coming just as quickly. How wrong I was! See, things don't work out that way. Haha on me!! I honestly thought that we would be moving on and away in a month, and poo on everyone around me! I think that line of thought helped aide in the waiting game. Maybe, just a little....??
So, I gave up my "I'll show you" attitude in exchange for a "God, show me" perspective, and boy oh boy, did He!! I have experienced healing, restoration, vision, guidance and love like I've not felt in a really long time! I allowed God into my heart, to dig around in those ugly feelings and hurts and disappointments, to uproot things that did not belong, and to plant things that do. I am a new creation in Christ through my pain, anger, disappointment, frustration, and self-pity. Praise God that I learned to lean on Him again, and to hear from Him again, and to fully trust in Him again!! I learned that the waiting doesn't have to be idle....but can be profitable, and life creating!
So, although I still get impatient, and frustrated, and want to hurry things along...I know that there is a plan at work, for my good and the good of those around me....and that God will do things in HIS perfect time! So again, I wait......